Yes, despite losing more followers than I’m receiving notes with these pictures, here they are yet again.
I’ve been asked (“asked” is the polite way to put it, more like statements) by two people now (anonymous, go figure) if these pictures aren’t just traces of photos.
The short answer is quite frankly: No, they are not. These paintings were traces, of sorts, if you disregard the many changes I made to the men in pictures, so it’s not as if I’d be embarrassed being “caught” tracing photos.
Here’s the long answer:
They started by being drawings with excessive amounts of ink in them. I was unsatisfied with them, as I wanted a negative space for the person in the drawings to wander about in. Black and white images don’t allow much play or variation with clean, negative space when the options are just those two colors. I didn’t want to paint them either, so I chose to work it out on my computer. Photoshop was sort of a challenge to me, as I’m not super-duper trained or experienced with it, unlike with painting on canvas which I find a little tedious now, since the challenge has gone. I’m absolutely the most happy in my life, when there’s something (of my choice, of course) to overcome and learn from. (For instance, I didn’t become a cook, because there was a bright future in cooking, but rather because I deep down just wanted to learn to make sublime meals .. the minute the learning stopped, I lost interest).
I basically approached it like I do with paintings on canvas, as it’s the only way I know how. A good friend lend me his body for poses, so I could see how shadows and colors would work, but I stripped him of few pounds and muscles, made his body look older and gave him a more collapsed sort of posture (aaaand imagined what sort of business was happening underneath his underwear - we are not THAT good friends).
The face I just based on my own, as that was the easiest (a simple mirror was used), and I pulled the hairline waaay back, gave him more saggy eyes and loads of grey in his skin, so he more closely would resemble my memories of how the he looked, but hoping to still present a sort of anybody-kind of guy in his late 30s.
The funny thing (if you will) about using my own face on him, was how it (to myself) distilled the idea a darkness that gets inside you via violence, or abuse, or any variation thereof, and lingers in you as a lifetime of addiction, or depressions or any other way people react to abuse in their childhood. The central idea of the project was to see my villain in life being swallowed up by the exact same darkness he created. But by sticking my face on him, this series of pictures not only ended up describing a vengefulness, a wish fulfillment of revenge, but to a very large extend also describing precisely what abuse does to a person. It’s easy for me to see the black pit, introduced by people one should have been able to trust, as a depression that one drags around, a permanent trench one is stuck in while the rest of the world is on ground level.